we had a bit of a Diet Meltdown last night, folks. since starting this journey in November, i've developed a real Been There, Done That, Regretted It Later, Moved On mentality. some days are really good and people leave lots of happy comments ... and other days you try to make turkey burgers.
let me explain: i've had this plan of making turkey burgers for some time now. i've accumulated a small collection of recipes, ranging from Seemingly Bland to French Onion Soup Mix, Yum! but had yet to try any of them. while trying to consider the particular tastes of my current housemates (Husband and Sister. always teaming up against me. srsly all day long with the teaming up. against me.) i found a recipe that sounded pretty good: Skinny BBQ Turkey Burgers*! and to think, it was delivered directly to my inbox. by Jillian Michaels herself! i had decided it was fate. we were having Skinny BBQ Turkey Burgers that night.
folks, i've tried a lot of recipes in my time, some good, some mediocre, but not since The Great Botched Waffle Breakfast of 2006 have i experienced such total catastrophic kitchen failure. i'll spare you some of the gory details, but the night went something like this:
1. double the recipe, in order to use the whole 2.5-pound container of ground turkey purchased from Sam's Club. (i've gone over it and over it, and so far i'm pretty sure this is my only mistake. why we needed to use that whole container i have no idea. i blame it on post-workout brain.)
2. follow the recipe, completely and precisely.
3. comment that the burgers seem a little soft, maybe they need to be chilled.
4. 20 minutes or so pass, burgers are still more like ... lumps of pancake batter.
5. decide to try to grill pancake batter. FAIL.
6. move grilling surface indoors, to trusty electric pancake griddle.
fast forward through the next couple hours, wherein much crying, shouting, carmelizing, vague threats, comparisons to meatloaf and gagging ensues. 2.5 pounds of Skinny BBQ Turkey Burger Pieces (minus a small amount that was choked down) is thrown away, never to be spoken of again. ... okay, so i had to come clean first. then we'll never speak of this again.)
10. drive to mall, purchase Rocky Rococo's for Husband, Berry-Cabernet and Chocolate-Raspberry gelato for Sister, and Grapefruit-Sage and Pineapple gelato for me.
"but i thought you were on a sweets ban until you leave for Germany!"
HAVE YOU NO IDEA THE SKINNY BBQ HELL I'VE JUST BEEN THROUGH? BACK OFF.
ahhh... much better. so there you have it. win some, lose some, eh?
anyway, so considering i had planned on eating leftover Skinny BBQ Turkey Burgers for lunch the next day, and had no alternative lunch plan, i wisely boiled up a few eggs to tide me over for lunch and breakfast for the next few days. "i'll have a yummy Popeye Salad**," i told myself. (Note: This is a much toned-down representation of this event. Details such as crying, whining, gagging, self-pity and panic have been left out because the writer is in extreme denial about her ability to emotionally cope with The Diet.)
so when i got to lunchtime and realized the ingredients for said Popeye Salad were lacking, i did not panic, no. i IMPROVISED. (see! progress!) considering i only had a little bit of spinach left in the fridge, i figured we'd have to sway from the original salad concept and get creative. i was lucky to find one last remaining pita left. (they're these yummy whole grain Kangaroo pouchy things my dear friend Meagan told me about that you can get in the deli aisle. so yummy and only include a few very healthy ingredients. would highly recommend!) enter: the best lunch rescue idea to date. here's what i did:
1. chopped up 1 hard-boiled egg, tossed out half the yoke. mixed together with a little bit of cottage cheese and seasoned with pepper. voila--instant egg salad! (or at least close enough!)
2. stuffed pita with spinach, tomato slices and egg salad-like mixture.
3. served with baby carrots, cucumber slices and one big hot serving of HELL YEAH.
sometimes it's the little victories in life that keep us going, no?
* clearly, i would not recommend you use this recipe. i should have known, after reading the part where the recipe writer suggests sauteeing onions in the microwave. feel free to leave lots of nasty comments, though! (what? i'm not bitter. i swears...)
** recipe for Popeye Salad coming soon in this week's Salad of the Week feature! get pumped, it's a keeper! :)